Social psychologist, Levinger (1974) defined the stages of love. According to him, as the relationship develops, there is a change in both, the intensity and the range of behavior.
a) Zero contact: this is a stage where two persons are total strangers.
b) Awareness stage: at this stage, they become aware of each other’s presence. However, impressions are formed unilaterally. At this stage if negative impression is formed, repeated exposure makes it more negative. But if the impression formed is positive or neutral, then it becomes positive after frequent exposures.
c) Surface contact: at this stage, there is some interaction and the bilateral impressions are formed.
d) Mutuality: persons are drawn to each other and become good acquaintances.
e) Moderate intersection: at this stage there is some sharing and they become good friends.
f) Major intersection: this is the stage where the persons start experiencing love i.e. deep emotions for each other.
Walster and Walster (1978) attempted to study the concept of love, scientifically. They suggested that there are two types of love:
1) passionate or romantic love
2) companionate love
Passionate or romantic love is defined as a stage of intense absorption in another. The lover experiences an intense psychological arousal. He or she seeks a complete self- fulfillment in this relationship. It is observed that parental interference intensifies this type of love. This effect is called, Romeo Juliet effect. It is momentary but can mature into companionate love. This passionate or romantic love is blind to each other’s shortcomings. It is more self centered thus it can resemble to 'having crush'.
Psychologists, Clyde and Susan Hendrick studied romantic love in more depth. According to them there are 6 basic dimensions of it.
a) Eros: this is a passionate or sexual love.
b) Ludus: this is a coy game playing love.
c) Storge: this encompasses friendship and caring.
d) Pragma: a practical, logical approach to love.
e) Mania: this is dependent or jealous love.
f) Agape: it is self-less, altruistic love.
Companionate love on the other hand is longer lasting. It may be for a lifetime. The couple in love treats each other equally and respectfully. The basic of this love is 'caring'. This love encourages mutual growth. The love is based on understanding each other, caring and sharing. The couple understands each other's shortcomings and accepts them. The foundation of this love is trust.
However, according to the psychologist, Robert Sternberb, there is only one kind of love that lives underneath the diversity of human experiences. His findings are based on statistical analysis of questionnaires applied to hundreds of people. According to him, the aspects of love are:
1) Deep understanding of the other.
2) Sharing of ideas and information.
3) Sharing of deep personal feelings.
4) Reciprocal emotional support to the other.
6) Helping the other.
7) Reciprocal dependency.
8) Reciprocal affection.
Though various researches have tried to study love, it still remains a mysterious concept as the nature of varies from person to person.
Hibernated today at hm most of the time today. Slept till 3pm then woke up coz too hot to continue liao. (no aircon at hm too poor liao... hehe)
then went into idle mode. totally lost dunno what to do. On the TV for 5 mins or so then off again. tried reading some notes but concentration lasted no more then 10 mins. Surf the web n read some rubbish here n there.
it was not until 5 plus then i start to think properly. Got a bit of the engine to work also. Called Ah Shun n found he alone at bugis doing nothing. (poor thing like me so lonely....) So we meet Vivo City.
Went walk walk n some window shopping then have dinner at Mr Kim's cafe. Went to new Central Resturant that is going to open tomolo. Met all the bosses there. Asked to go back work for them but i said we need to tok about the timing first. Lesson is the priority now. (they will juz call me to tok about it stime)
Happen to walk pass Starhub shop there n saw the last few mins of liverpool vs sunderland. haha they got TVs outside the shop with live matches.
Last goal of the match between the partnership Torres n Veronin. Final score 2-0 to Pool. Pool's becoming a more exciting team this season. Its going to be competing against the 2 super club for all the title this season
